"A Letter from Hebrew U"

e-mail from Sarah Szymkowicz (former Tagar President) who narrowly
missed the bombing at the Frank Sinatra International Center at Hebrew
University where she is currently studying for the semester.

The Hebrew University Campus on Mt. Scopus in Jerusalem

Shalom from Israel! I know many of you are worried and that you all are
concerned about my health and well being. I figured you all might
appreciate an e-mail to tell you my story of the last few days in Israel.
These have been an intense few days and I am still realizing what happened
and the situation I was in.

My time in Israel started out normally enough. I arrived on Tuesday, July
30th. I got my dorm room which was a balegan, but that is normal for
Israel. I met the other students on the Hebrew U oversees program and
decided they were nice.

On Wednesday, July 31st I got up to register for classes. I filled out some
forms and decided to set up my e-mail account and eat lunch. I wanted to
set up my e-mail account first, but my friends wanted to eat, so I went with
them. I went to the Frank Sinatra cafeteria outside the Rothberg
International school. We were told that is where everyone goes. We went
inside and to my dismay they were playing Emimem. We all got some food and
left to set up our e-mail accounts (I also left because of Emimem). As I
just finished setting up my account I heard an explosion. Car alarms went
off and everyone in the room jumped. One of my friends ran out to ask an
Israeli what the noise was, he told her it was a supper-sonic boom. I
believed him because I wanted it to be true, I did not want to believe
people were dead.

A minute latter someone came in and said "There was a bomb on campus,
outside of the Frank Sinatra!" My first thought was "Was there anyone
inside?" My friend started crying. I hugged her and we both stared at the
scene while trying furiously to get through to our friends and family. All
of the sudden my friend said "Janice!". Janice was someone who worked in
the Hebrew U New York office who flew over with us to help us get settled
in. She was eating at the table next to us and was still there when we
left. Some Israelis told us to get inside and asked us if we were okay. I
said "No, I am not okay, I am angry." They simply replied, "This is life
here." I thought to myself, this is not life, this is death, anyone who is
here is one step away.

After we went inside Hebrew U gathered all of us for a meeting to tell us
what was going on. They told us they did not know anything but to please
sign in so they could account for people and to call our parents. We were
supposed to go to the mall as a group in the afternoon, since that was
canceled we went back to our dorms. A bunch of us played cards and a few of
us davened mincha. While we were playing we got a call from an other
student. He said he had to leave because the American government decided he
should not be at Hebrew U for security reasons. We helped him pack up.

While we were waiting we were pulled into a psychology session. At that
point we were all too numb and excited to talk. Trying to be Israeli, and
move on, I left to go downtown to celebrate Avi’s 21st birthday with him.
We had a nice dinner and I bought him a bottle of wine because he is 21
(even though in Israel the drinking age is 18). However, I think I needed
the wine more then he did.

When I went back to campus a bunch of people were sitting outside the dorms,
eating pizza and drinking beer. No one mentioned anything about the bombing
except to ask if anyone had heard from Janice. A reporter came over to
interview a few of us. It was painful to rehash the details, but once I
started talking I could not stop. We all had such different perspectives on
what happened, but we all had one thing in common. We were in a way glad
that we were not at the sene when it happened, but we were also wondering
why we were away while others where there.

I went to sleep and woke up the next morning to bench gomel. It felt good
to pray and thank God for saving my life, even though at the time I felt
more like I was in the right place at the right time. However, we were
promised a normal day, and we sort of got that. We got an orientation and
the first day of ulpan. During orientation they went over what to do if
there is an other attack. Next was ulpan. Right before ulpan I found out
at Janice was in fact dead. I was upset but I brushed it off by saying I
did not know her that well. At first it was fine, but then my mind started
wondering. I started thinking about how things were messed up and why all
those people had to die.

Later that night I was in my room doing my ulpan homework and I started
thinking about the events of the day before. I thought about the explosion
and Janice who is no longer with us. I thought about what a nice lady she
was and got very sad. I also thought about how this trip was supposed to be
a quick thing for her. As far as I know she had no children and was not
married, this made me even more upset and I started crying. I cried for the
loss of Janie’s young life and for the horrible experience I had. I cried
for the people who were hurt and from all the emotions that I had bottled up
in order to move on. I realized for the first time that I could have died.
I ate at the Frank Sinatra about 20 minutes before the bomb went off. If I
had set up my e-mail account first, I would have been eating there at that
moment. And Janice was at the table next to mine, so it really could have
been me.

After I finished my homework my roommate came in and attempted to rest, but
then she started crying. I took her hand and we cried together. That was
really the first time that I expressed any real emotion to an other student.
Partly because we were told things have to get back to normal and partly
because none of us had realized what had really happened.

On Friday I woke up and went to ulpan again. We sang songs as part of our
lesson. It felt very strange to be singing when we had all just had the
most horrible experience of our lives. The last song we learned is a very
famous Israeli song called "Ani V’Atah". The song says "You and I will
change the world". My teacher ended the class with "I hope you will all
change the world because there is a lot to change."

Shabbat was filled with lots of emotion for me. On Friday night I davened
at Yakar, which is a Carlebach-style minyan. On the way there I saw lots of
people walking to services which made me happy. It reminded me of one of
the many reasons I wanted to study in Jerusalem. The service completely
uplifted up spirits. At the end they announced members of the community
that were killed or wounded in the bombing, which brought me down a little
bit. On Saturday I davened at a small minyan which is supposedly an
orthadox-egalitarian minyan. Everyone in that room was effected by the
bombing in some way. They lost 2 members of the community. We said tehilim
because the dead and injured consumed us. I could not get through the first
one before I started crying. A big wound was opened up that I did not
realize was there. It did not take long for about half the room to find out
that I knew one of the dead and was about 200 feet away from the bomb when
it went off. Even those who knew someone who died were shocked and offered
condolences.

In spite of everything I still had a very nice Shabbat and I am having a
great time in Israel. The people on my program are very nice and all the
Israelis I have met all want to help me in some way. Jerusalem is still
wonderful and beautiful and I will take was I can get. I wish I could see my
family, I have made about 7 phone calls to them in the last 3 days. I know I
will be okay though, because I have my new friends at Hebrew U and Avi, my
boyfriend of 2 and ˝ years who has been there for me unconditionally is here
with me in Jerusalem . . .

I still feel a lot of pain. The breaking down crying told me that the
wounds will be there for a long time. I keep hearing the sound of the bomb
going off in my head. I will be okay, our people are always okay. Please,
the next time you see me, give me a hug. I am so grateful to be e-mailing
everyone of you and to know all of you.
 

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